Self Pleasure

Self Pleasure IS Self Care 

Right now we are all going through some of the most intense emotional rollercoasters we have ever dealt with; feelings of uncertainty, insecurity and let’s face it… some fear. Point to the lie in what I just said… I’ll wait… there isn’t one. Some of us are going through this “Quarantine” solo, some of us with a partner(s) or even dual quarantining. While others are still needing to work and then come straight home to whichever situation. In one way or another, or in several, we are ALL having to cope with the reality and new ‘normal’ that is the world today. 

We have to wash the groceries, stay updated on the news, restock up on hand sanitizer. Many are learning how to sew, bake or paint. There are Zoom meetings, panels and online classes we want to take. We feel like we need to be so productive during these unprecedented times and are so stressed out that we are forgetting about the other layers to ourselves. This is why self pleasure (which IS self care!) is so very important, especially right now. Why don’t we hang out a bit and just chat briefly on the topic shall we?  

‘Self Pleasure’… there are so many ways to define what this even means to each individual. This can vary vastly depending on how you identify sexually, what gets you going, if orgams or edging is the goal, and even just how you are feeling that day to name a few. Self Pleasure is defined as pleasing or satisfying oneself, the gratifying of one’s own impulses, needs, or desires. Did you catch that? It said gratifying one’s “needs”. You need this, so take some time and handle…yourself. 

There are so many positive benefits to Self Pleasure, besides a way to kill some time, especially right now. Biologically speaking, dopamine and oxytocin are two hormones that are both released when we have an orgasm. Besides making us feel good, they also help us with stress and anxiety, which I’m pretty sure a lot of us could use a little feel good stress-relief at this point. Having trouble sleeping? Suffering from a little pain? The endorphins released when you masturbate will help ease these annoyances. Lets not forget however, it also helps boost that immune system of yours… so really, this is for the good of your health. 

TOYS for Self Pleasure 

Want a little assistance with that regular dose of self love? Maybe you are already on board but now have a hand cramp? Or just want to mix up what’s in your masturbation rotation?  Well ok, let’s talk a toy or two (or three) then! 

For vagina owners, may I suggest trying out the Melt by We Vibe. It’s small, quiet (but you don’t have to be), body safe and completely waterproof. The charge lasts forever and it has an app you can download for free and even “share” control. Meaning you can give someone else control of your toy from ANYWHERE. Find yourself currently in a LDR due to Miss Rona? This is a fun way to be together while apart. So besides all those bells and whistles, the toy works by suction and pulsation waves around your clitoris and it really does the job every single time. 

For penis owners, I like the Cobra Libre II by Fun Factory. It’s small and not incredibly bulky like some sex toys geared towards penises. Like the Melt it too is completely body safe and totally waterproof with a long lasting charge. Tired of all that stroking or squeezing a sleeve? The way this toy works is it covers the head of the penis and delivers deep rumbling vibrations that travel. With eleven settings I doubt you will be forgetting to practice a little self pleasure daily.

So you like butt stuff you say? Then I highly recommend  ANYTHING from B Vibe.The Anal Traing Kit & Education set is one of my favorites. It graduates from a small butt plug, to a medium vibrating one, and finally a large weighted one. It even comes with an enema and lube applicator! Aren’t they thoughtful? These cuties for your bootie are totally body safe and splash proof. They even provide a guide so you can get to know yourself. Also check out their site, they have loads of advice on all things anal play. 

So what if toys aren’t your jam, you just don’t have any or maybe already tired of the ones you have? There are still lots of ways to get into the mood to love yourself a little. My number one go to is sound when my head is just not in the game. Sound can play a big part in either being distracted or being immersed in a feeling. Think about when someone whispers something sexy in your ear and how that makes you feel. So headphones and ear plugs will be your best friend here. Take a moment to make a playlist and fill it with songs that give you the sexy feels, bedroom music if you will. Consider it a sort of self flirtation knowing that with each song you add you are getting closer to some time hands on with yourself. Grab your headphones or if you want connect your speakers and play it as loud as you please, just don’t make the neighbors mad if you don’t want any interruptions. Fully immerse yourself in the sound and how the music makes you feel as you explore your erogenous zones to the beat. Perhaps all that music is just too distracting or maybe be too over stimulating. So bust out those headphones, get in your favorite position and breathe. They say silence is golden right? In a world where all day we hear are sirens, cars, horns, random people’s conversations, some quiet time is a rare find. Drink it all in, concentrate on our breathing, how your fingers on your own skin, the temperature of the sheets you’re laying on. Take your time exploring what makes you feel good and then slow it down and do it again. We have nothing but time right now so go on an adventure with your body. 

So now you have just a little insight on why taking care of your needs are so very important. I can empathize that even trying to get into the right headspace to even feel motivated to take off your undies (if you’re even wearing them at this stage in the quarantine) can in itself feel like a whole mission. I hope these toy suggestions help to get you there and make your “you”  time a little more interesting and way more orgasmic. Remember now, this is for the good of your health. 

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